How to Insert the Tampon: A Real Talk About Getting It Right

Let me start by saying this: if you're reading this, you're probably sitting on your bathroom floor with a box of tampons, feeling like you're trying to solve a Rubik's cube blindfolded. I've been there. We've all been there. And honestly? The little instruction pamphlet that comes folded up like origami inside the box might as well be written in ancient Sanskrit for all the good it does when you're actually trying to figure this out.

The first time I tried to use a tampon, I was fourteen and convinced I'd somehow managed to lose it inside my body forever. Spoiler alert: I hadn't even gotten it in properly. It was just... there. Halfway. Like a confused tourist stuck in a revolving door.

The Anatomy Lesson Nobody Actually Gives You

Before we dive into the mechanics, let's talk about what's actually going on down there. Your vagina isn't a straight vertical tunnel like those diagrams in health class suggest. It actually angles backward toward your tailbone – think more like a tilted pocket than an elevator shaft. This is probably the single most important thing nobody tells you, and it's why so many of us spend our first attempts jabbing at ourselves like we're trying to thread a needle in the dark.

The vaginal canal is also remarkably elastic and forgiving. It's designed to accommodate things going in and out (babies, for instance), so a tampon is really no big deal from your body's perspective. But your brain? Your brain might be having a full-on meltdown, and that's completely normal.

Choosing Your Fighter

Not all tampons are created equal, and this isn't just marketing fluff. When you're starting out, grab the slimmest ones you can find – usually labeled "light" or "junior." Yes, even if your flow could rival Niagara Falls. You can always upgrade later, but right now we're focusing on the learning curve, not absorption capacity.

Plastic applicators are generally easier for beginners than cardboard ones. They're smoother, they glide better, and they don't have that weird tendency to expand and get sticky when they encounter moisture (which, let's face it, is inevitable in this situation). Some people swear by cardboard for environmental reasons, and that's valid, but maybe save the planet after you've mastered the basics.

The Position Situation

Here's where things get interesting. Every guide tells you to put one foot up on the toilet, like you're Captain Morgan posing for a rum advertisement. And sure, that works for some people. But I'm going to let you in on a secret: there are actually multiple positions that work, and you need to find yours.

Some people do better squatting slightly. Others find success lying on their back with knees bent. I have a friend who swears by standing with one leg hiked up on the bathtub edge. The point is, your body is unique, and what works for your best friend might leave you feeling like a pretzel.

The key is to relax your pelvic muscles. Easier said than done when you're concentrating harder than a chess grandmaster, I know. But tension is your enemy here. Take a few deep breaths. Maybe put on some music. This isn't a race.

The Actual Insertion Process

Alright, here we go. Hold the tampon applicator between your thumb and middle finger, right where the smaller tube meets the larger one – there's usually a little grip area there. Your index finger is going to be your pusher finger, so keep it free.

Now, the angle is crucial. Remember what I said about the vaginal canal angling backward? This is where that knowledge pays off. Don't aim straight up like you're launching a rocket. Instead, angle the applicator toward your lower back. Think about aiming for your tailbone, not your belly button.

Gently insert the larger tube until your fingers (the ones holding the grip) touch your body. This is your depth gauge. If you don't go far enough, you'll feel the tampon with every move you make. Too far isn't really possible – your cervix acts like a natural barrier.

Once you're at the right depth, use your index finger to push the smaller tube all the way into the larger one. This pushes the tampon out of the applicator and into position. Then – and this is important – remove the applicator at the same angle you inserted it. Don't just yank it straight out.

The "Did I Do It Right?" Checklist

If you've done it correctly, you shouldn't feel the tampon at all. Seriously. If you can feel it, it's either not in far enough or it's at a weird angle. The vaginal canal doesn't have many nerve endings past the first couple of inches, so a properly placed tampon becomes essentially invisible to your nervous system.

The string should hang outside your body. If you can't find the string, don't panic. It's probably just tucked up against your body. A gentle exploration with clean fingers will locate it. Despite urban legends, tampons cannot get lost in your body. Your cervix is like a dead end street – nowhere for it to go.

When Things Don't Go According to Plan

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, it just doesn't work. Maybe you're too tense. Maybe you're at a weird point in your cycle where everything feels different. Maybe Mercury is in retrograde. Who knows? The point is, it's okay to take a break and try again later.

If you've made multiple attempts and you're starting to feel sore, stop. Give yourself a few hours or even try again tomorrow. Forcing it is never the answer and will only make you more tense the next time.

Some people find it helpful to try for the first time while they're actually on their period. The menstrual flow provides natural lubrication that can make insertion easier. Others prefer to practice with just water-based lubricant when they're not menstruating. Both approaches are valid.

The Removal Process (Because What Goes In Must Come Out)

Taking a tampon out is generally easier than putting it in, but it can still feel weird the first few times. The key is to relax (there's that word again) and pull gently on the string at the same angle you inserted it. If you feel resistance, don't force it. Take a breath, adjust your position slightly, and try again.

If the tampon is very dry (maybe you left it in too long or your flow was lighter than expected), removal might be uncomfortable. In this case, bear down slightly – like you're trying to poop – while pulling gently. This helps relax the muscles and can make removal easier.

The Stuff Nobody Talks About

Let's address some real concerns that don't make it into the official guides:

Sometimes you might insert a tampon and then immediately need to pee. This is normal. The tampon can put pressure on your urethra, making you feel like you need to go. You don't need to remove the tampon to pee – just hold the string to the side.

Occasionally, you might experience what I call "tampon burps" – little pockets of air that get trapped during insertion and then escape later. It's not a fart, it's not anything wrong with you, it's just physics doing its thing. Totally normal, if mildly embarrassing when it happens in a quiet yoga class.

Some people find that tampons feel different at different points in their cycle. When you're just starting or ending your period, your vaginal canal might be less lubricated, making insertion more challenging. This is why having a variety of sizes and maybe some lubricant on hand isn't a bad idea.

The Learning Curve Is Real

I want to be really clear about something: it's completely normal if it takes you multiple cycles to get comfortable with tampons. Some people get it on the first try, others take months. Neither timeline makes you better or worse at being a person who menstruates.

There's this weird pressure to master tampon use immediately, like it's some sort of rite of passage you're failing if you can't figure it out right away. That's nonsense. You're learning a new skill that requires understanding your body in a way you probably haven't before. Give yourself grace.

When to Consider Alternatives

Tampons aren't for everyone, and that's perfectly fine. If you've given it an honest try and it's just not working for you, there's no shame in sticking with pads, trying menstrual cups, period underwear, or any other method that feels right for your body.

Some medical conditions can make tampon use uncomfortable or inadvisable. If you experience persistent pain, unusual discharge, or any other concerning symptoms when trying to use tampons, talk to a healthcare provider. They can help determine if there's an underlying issue or if tampons just aren't the right choice for your body.

Final Thoughts

Learning to use tampons is like learning to ride a bike – except the bike is invisible, you're doing it in private, and nobody really talks about how they learned to do it. But just like riding a bike, once you get it, it becomes second nature.

Be patient with yourself. Your body is not broken if you can't get it right immediately. You're not doing anything wrong if it takes multiple attempts. And you're definitely not alone if you find the whole process frustrating, confusing, or even a little bit absurd.

Remember, at the end of the day, this is just one option for managing your period. The best menstrual product is the one that makes you feel comfortable and confident. Whether that's tampons, pads, cups, discs, or free-bleeding into period underwear while binge-watching Netflix – you do you.

The tampon police aren't going to come for you if you decide this isn't your thing. But if you do want to master this particular skill, now you have some real, practical information to work with. Take your time, be kind to yourself, and remember – we've all been that person on the bathroom floor, instruction pamphlet in hand, wondering if we're doing it right.

Authoritative Sources:

American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Your First Period (Especially for Teens). ACOG, 2019.

Boston Children's Hospital. "Tampon Use and Safety." Young Women's Health, Boston Children's Hospital, 2021, youngwomenshealth.org/2013/03/28/tampons/.

Farage, Miranda A., and Kenneth W. Miller, editors. The Vulva: Anatomy, Physiology, and Pathology. CRC Press, 2017.

Mayo Clinic Staff. "Menstrual Cup: What Is It and How Do You Use One?" Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research, 2022, mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/womens-health/in-depth/menstrual-cup/art-20046042.

North American Society for Pediatric and Adolescent Gynecology. Tampon Safety. NASPAG, 2020.

Planned Parenthood Federation of America. "How to Insert a Tampon." Planned Parenthood, 2023, plannedparenthood.org/learn/health-and-wellness/menstruation/how-do-i-use-tampons-pads-and-menstrual-cups.

U.S. Food and Drug Administration. "The Facts on Tampons—and How to Use Them Safely." FDA Consumer Health Information, U.S. Food and Drug Administration, 2020, fda.gov/consumers/consumer-updates/facts-tampons-and-how-use-them-safely.